Wednesday, April 27, 2005


Talking it up

On the April 28 program we spar with Dell Computers’ telemarketing department. Join Veronica, Mike and me as we go around the mulberry bush.

Also, a brief memorial for Lucien Carr, one of the essential characters of the Beat Generation.

Ray Cotolo will be by to discuss the legacy of the show, in that he may take over in twenty some-odd years. And believe me, they would be some odd years, all right.

Coming up on the show –

May 5 – Dusty Nathan is the guest on our special Kentucky Derby program. Two days before the world’s most coveted horse race, Dusty and I plunder the history, handicapping and hoorah of this marvelous event.

May 12 – Walter Stewart is our guest. A quiet man who cast a large shadow in the music industry over the years, Mr. Stewart will talk about his days of wine and roses and how the music industry today survives the new arena of product and presentations.

May 19 – Hold onto your seats, Leigh Silver is with us and she has a report from the indie world through the eyes of the young and the beautiful. This talented and beautiful woman will enlighten us once more with what it takes to continue on the road to success.

May 26 – The great Paul Williams returns to talk more about his particular blend of philosophy that has influenced thousands of rock critics, journalists, fans and even artists over the years. The father of Crawdaddy magazine in conversation with the bastard of radio.

It's 9 p.m. EST, live. Check the affliates list for live or rebroadcast time.

Monday, April 25, 2005


The dealmaker

So it was a typical Sunday and I had my morning coffee in my office looking out at the vast green land that is mine, all mine, when the phone rang and I heard the voice of Schyler Bondpaper on the answering machine response. I picked it up and made no apology for screening the call. Schyler said he was used to it, anyway, because anyone who thinks he will call keeps their answering machine prepared.

I asked him what he wanted from me on a Sunday morning.
He said, “Let’s talk more about your autobiography.”
Schyler, for any readers who happen to be unworldly folk, is a biography expert. He has been responsible for major biography book deals and, after living through an explosion planted by his former wife to assassinate him, works out of an office in Barcelona.
“So you must think you can get me a deal,” I said to him.
“Of course. I have a number of publishers interested,” he said. “But their deals won’t last.”
“Why not?”
“Some of the men involved don’t bribe easily.”
“Look,” I said, widening my eyes so there would be a clause for this quote, “I will entertain any deals.”

Schyler insisted upon telling me one of the deals while he was on the phone, even though I was not ready to entertain any particular deal. After all, I was only on my first cup of coffee and rarely entertained anything or anybody before my second cup. Still, I listened.
“You can write anything you want,” he said, “and have only one source. That source can be yourself. And you can choose what photos are published, as long as none of them show you with Olivia Newton John.”
“Sounds all right so far,” I said.
“There are some details to work out, yet,” he said. “But I can make this deal great for you.”
“Work on it,” I said, wishing him a happy rest of the day and hanging up.

Then, I went to my computer, launched Word and continued my current spectacle, The Complete and Unabridged History of Japan. But before I typed a word I thought to myself how I regretted tossing a full ash tray at Schyler’s head back in ’87 when he was still married to a wanna-be assassin.

I will keep you posted on the developments concerning the autobiography.

Friday, April 22, 2005


Matt, Nicky and Jolie lips

Thanks again to Matthew Mungle for being a guest on our April 21 show and being the first Oscar-winner ever to appear on an internet broadcast. I challenge anyone to defrock that statement.

I admit I was wrong about Nicole Kidman. Now I am a fan of her acting as well as she has become more beautiful since I have realized what a great actress she is and since, of course, she left Tom Cruise. There, I said it.

I admit, also, that I visit fan sites for Angelina Jolie. Even though my wife has the same brand of lips. What am I, drunk?

Back to Matt. He will be on our show again when he is at liberty to talk about his new movie projects. He is sworn to secrecy about them now, as I am about my movie project and my autobiography. Other than that, he and I have little in common. Unless you figure in that we agree Matt should have used silicone and not gelitin on James Woods’ face in Ghosts of Mississippi. I still cannot figure how a man of Matt’s talent goofed that deal up.

Please check the affiliates’ list below for rebroadcasts of the show. See ya on Monday.

9 p.m. EST Thursdays

Wednesday, April 20, 2005


Makin' up is hard to do

The April 21 program welcomes Academy Award-winning make-up effects man, Matt Mungle. His work in Bram Stoker’s Dracula won him Hollywood’s highest honor, but it is just the tip of the iceberg. Mungle’s body of work is impressive.

Check out James Woods in Ghosts of Mississippi. That was Mungle work.
Check out the misery on the faces of the characters in Schindler’s List. That was Mungle work.
Check out the monsters in Van Helsing. That was Mungle work.
Check out the misery attached to the gorgeous faces in Girl Interrupted. That was Mungle work.
The list goes on. Come by and listen. The show begins at 9 p.m. EST.

C-Chronicles welcomes Sean Radio to the affiliates’ list.

Monday, April 18, 2005


Conclave chronicles

It is a difficult task writing a blog on the day of the Cardinals’ Conclave. So, Chronicles sent Meyer Boneface, Jr. to the Vatican to report on the vote for a new Pope.

ROME – First off, let me document that sometimes this city looks like it was built in a day. Ratty place, really. If it weren’t for the fragrance of great food being cooked in every cubby hole, this would be a stinking hole in the Earth. Ok, so, it adds to the mystery and, many believe, the Holy Spirit’s participation in what goes on here over the next few days. The conclave to elect a new pope is the focus of Roman Catholic Church. The conclave’s action is one of history's longest-lived electoral experiences. It is filled with tradition, though the Three Musketeers are never mentioned in the process.

The event has not occurred in more than 26 years. Actually, it was after the death of the Pope before this one that brought the conclave together and that, as far as history reveals, was the last time the word “conclave” was used in a news report. The process dates back nearly a millennium, which even then was misspelled more times than not.

Somehow, though it is not allowed, I got into the conclave. I am using a blanket I got from a bullfight report I did last summer in Barcelona. It is weird in this room of top Catholic men who all smell like Old Spice aftershave lotion. I cannot think with all these guys mumbling. All of them are candidates as well as they make up the electorate. There are already favorites in the race for Pope.

The longest conclave took two years, nine months and two days in the election of Gregory X. That was in 1271. Gregory X, not surprisingly, wrote rules to speed the conclaves and demanded to know how the name “Gregory” got so popular. He said that if no Pope was elected within three days, Cardinal rations were to be cut to one meal a day. After five more days, the Cardinals would be restricted to bread and water. On the sixth day, they would have to cook their own meals.

That did it. The next election lasted one day. The new pope, Innocent V, lasted five months. Before he died, though, he demanded to know how the name “Innocent” became so popular.

That’s my report for now, because someone is coming and I have to act like I am a Cardinal or be kicked out. I told them my name was Cardinal Claudia and some of them are beginning to get suspicious.

Friday, April 15, 2005


Thanks, now what? Oh look, more great stuff ahead

Professor Lawrence Lessig was a great guest on our April 14 show and will be back to talk more about Creative Commons and the battle for intellectual property in this great new arena, the WWW. Check our affiliates list to hear the April 14 program again or to catch it if you missed it. The show will be rebroadcast at various stations this weekend. And, you can podcast the program through Podcast Alley. We are in the Cultural/Political section.

Next week, what we feel is a first for internet radio—an interview with a man who won an Academy Award. Matt Mungle won an Oscar for achievement in makeup for the movie Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Check it out if you haven’t seen it or watch it again before Thursday, April 21 when we give Matt the Chroncles make over, so to speak. More about this in next week days’ blog entries.

Catch up on The Complete and Unabridged History of Japan, hug your loved ones, try not to smile like Tony Robbins, don't get caught with illegal throat lozengers, put your hair in a net and lay back, taking the weekend in stride.

Wednesday, April 13, 2005


The professor takes the stand

GRANTVILLE, Penn. -- Lawrence Lessig, a Stanford University law professor and one of the philosopher kings of Internet law, tagged The Elvis of Cyberlaw, will be the sole guest on the April 14 edition of Cotolo Chronicles at 9 p.m. EST.

A top show among podcasters and one of the Internet’s most popular talk programs, Cotolo Chronicles is based at Ampcast dot com and heard live on a slew of Internet radio stations, as well as it is rebroadcast on stations the weekend following the live show—a list of stations is available at .

Professor Lessig has become a must-heard voice for a confused community of Web participants dealing with creativity on the stage of the new technology. His legal-leaning view of copyrights in this new territory launched his association with Creative Commons, a project to build a layer of flexible copyrights in the face of increasingly restrictive default rules.

Professor Lessig says the decision to outlaw downloading would have a profoundly inhibiting effect on the creation of culture. He said that in every instance, from the player piano to radio to VCRs to cable, the law had landed on the side of the alleged "pirates," allowing for the copying or broadcasting of cultural works for private consumption.

“Our program,” says Chronicles host Frank Cotolo, “has been a lone voice on the Web for many of the causes in which the professor campaigns. He is an essential character in the new arena of creative forces and everyone should read his books.”

Free Culture--How Big Media Uses Technology and the Law to Lock Down Culture and Control Creativity is one of his books and is available for free under a Creative Commons license. Once you download the book, you may redistribute, copy, or otherwise reuse/remix this book provided that you do so for non-commercial purposes and credit Professor Lessig.

Monday, April 11, 2005


A short essay: the difference in being good

There is an old saying in Hollywood. The saying is as old as the industry that built the city. The saying is: "Don't give me something new, give me something good." This policy statement comes to mind today as I begin another week and think about the time I have wasted in my life being different. The sad thing about it all is that it came so naturally to me to be different. I never had to work at it.

Being different is not good, as the statement implies. Being different ruins relationships and careers and, dare I say it, governments and civilizations. That's why anyone who is not common-minded and focused upon pleasing the least common denominator pretty much fails in the way that those very people judge other people. In other words, it is the reason why the Bushes become Presidents and the businessmen run show business and Michael Bolton makes music.

Don't get me wrong; I am common in many ways and I can find wonderful entertainment in "good" as opposed to "different." But in the ways that genuinely count I am a failure, an utter waste of social space. Anyone I "reach" through my art and entertainment practices has a "different streak" that I touch. Hopefully, they are more into "good" than "different" and my influence won't weigh down their journey of success.

Meanwhile, I thought of deleting this essay because it is different, not good. Then I thought of the fact that Joe Scarborough has a news program and a blog and I decided to keep this edition of my blog. After all, it's different.

Friday, April 08, 2005


Any crash you can walk away from ...

We apologize to our listeners, our affiliates and of course our scheduled guest, Paul Williams, for circumstances beyond our control on April 7 that forced cancellation of our show.

It was the ISP’s fault, as Comcast Web facilities crashed harder than Clancy’s nuts early that evening and did not return to full capacity until early the next morning.

So, look for “best of” programs on our rebroadcast stations and don’t get yer knickers in a twist because Acts of God like that which prevented broadcasting on April 7 are not likely to happen a lot. In fact, even The Bible tells us that Acts of God are rare, no less the kind where his big, deep voice is heard throughout the valley. As long as we are not under doctors’ orders to do otherwise, we will broadcast our program live on Thursday nights and have that show available to stations for rebroadcast and, of course, for those using iPods.

In the meantime, take deep breaths and have a great weekend, remembering that no words of wisdom can make you wiser if those words are stupid and meaningless. And, unfortunately, there are more of the latter kinds of words around then there ever will be words of wisdom. But, you may feel ignorance is bliss, so to thine own self be true.

Thursday, April 07, 2005


Paul Williams returns

Hey ‘net radio enthusiasts and iPodders, it’s time for another trip (and I mean trip) through the rock of ages and walk in the zen of it all with the founding father of modern rock journalism, Paul Williams. On the April 7 show, our favorite friend of culture and founder of Crawdaddy magazine, joins us again by phone from his quiet abode in California.

Paul’s new book is Bob Dylan—Mind Out Of Time, a volume connected to his treatise on the performing artist, as seen through Dylan. Paul is also the author of many books involving practical philosophy, which I encourage everyone to address. You can get all of these at Paul’s Web home page.

We are sorry to hear that our friend Tyler and his Planet Radio/The Box station has pulled the plug. These are tough times for this new medium, which is going through its life stages faster than a skunk in a Chinese noodle factory.

We do welcome another pioneer, however, to Web radio and as an affiliate. deserves a look by any and all indies. Sean is launching his ship and bringing our show along for the journey.

Our other affiliates are (and please check for live or rebroadcast status by clicking on the link and reading what each station has to offer)—

9 p.m. EST Thursdays

Monday, April 04, 2005


Looking ahead, just a bit

With the Pope dead and a new Pope poised to take position, the new week looks brightly at us in all hemispheres. What will we do to make this week best for our lives, our children’s lives and our children’s children’s lives?

Think about that and allow the burden to heavily lean on your pleasures. And, think of better times, like the coming Thursday, April 7, when Paul Williams returns as a guest to Cotolo Chronicles.

This is a good time, also, to hit the Web and catch up on The Complete and Unabridged History of Japan, a novel in the making at Indie Journal Daily. Why wait until it is a major motion picture? Read the prose.

And welcome to Baseball for 2005. Steroids or not, this is a great sport, a ballet for men, a rite of spring. Abner Doubleday was no fag, in any definition of that word. He knew that smacking a hardball with a long, thick piece of wood could be a metaphor for male determination. So even if you have to dig into your bank accounts for the money, try to go to at least seven baseball games live this year. If you don’t have a son to take, ask someone who does. Or take your girlfriend (but not if your wife wants to go). Or go alone.

And get better Neil Young.

Friday, April 01, 2005


Some reminders for the weekend

Thanks again to Chris Costello for her visit to the show. We will be talking more with Chris as the 100th anniversary of Lou Costello’s birthday—which we hope to cover next March exclusively for our network and podcast—as the festivities develop. Meanwhile, check out Abbott and Costello collectables.

Time again to vote at Podcast Alley for Cotolo Chronicles. Drop by this link -- and give us a vote for April’s standings. Gonna be a great month of guests, topics and fun with cooked noodles. Your vote helps us become exposed to new listeners and downloaders.

For those who have asked again about the book I read from during the Dressing Room Hour of the show on March 31, it is The Air Conditioned Nightmare by Henry Miller and it should be available at Amazon.

We apologize for any problems ignited by our difficulties recording the March 31 network hours and hope to have all problems solved by next week's live broadcast. Have a great weekend.

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