Tuesday, November 30, 2004
You asked for it
Some questions posed to me via email, along with my answers to them.
Q: Isn’t your show based on the radio program that John Daley did in the ‘50s?
A: Not entirely. Daley’s program, if you recall more vividly, required the use of at least ten stuntmen. Nothing I do requires even one. Also, Daley spoke a lot about eating red meat while smoking Lucky Strikes and did so never once using a noun.
Q: Do you have a lisp?
A: Many people ask that, but I have no problem with the sounds that give one a lisp. Nor do I bleed through the nose, as most of them tend to do.
Q: Ever since you started The Liquid Water Society [LWS] my wife has become distant to me. In a rare moment of confession, she said to me that unless I speak in a redundant manner, she cannot love me like she used to love me. My use of the English language is better, true, but my wife has lost her desire to be intimate with me, no less using a Joe Palooka punching bag to simulate a threesome. What would you do?
A: Sir, your wife is using LWS as an excuse, in my opinion, for a love that was lost long ago. In fact, I didn’t want to mention this, but every Tuesday afternoon I see her with a well-dressed man lunching in a café not far from your home. I can only assume she sees him privately and gets bopped without the stressful addition of the Palooka doll. You should keep speaking well, but not of her.
Q: What about copper dual-damascene devices?
A: Briefly, they are composed of six or more levels of interconnect wiring. A dielectric diffusion barrier is deposited atop copper lines to prevent diffusion between metal levels and to act as a etch stop during via formation. However, achieving a good copper/barrier bond has always been difficult. Implementing strict process control for the barrier’s thickness alone can improve yield but is one of science’s great metrology challenges.
Q: In the early shows you stood up and walked around more than you do now. Any reason for that?
A: It was my doctor’s orders back then. However, when I learned the orders had nothing to do with my health and all to do with his being an ex-Nazi, I stopped listening to anything he said.
Q: Why isn’t your Blog generally interesting, like J-Walk’s popular pages?
A: Good question. First, I have no interest in presenting my readers with information they might or might not like. Second, to compete with J-Walk is stupid because what he does best no one can do as well. Third, I hate to wear baseball caps. Fourth, I know nothing about Excel. Fifth, I run the risk of J-Walk learning that I purposely shoot rabbits just for the hell of it. Sixth, no man is an island. Seventh, the sins of the family fall on the daughter. And eighth, if not last on a list of eight, at least, not being like him allows me to mention him in my Blog and have him mention me because of that and I get more readers for a day or two. Incidentally, J-Walk's fascinating Blog can be reached on the internet at http://www.j-walkblog.com/blog/.
Q: Isn’t your show based on the radio program that John Daley did in the ‘50s?
A: Not entirely. Daley’s program, if you recall more vividly, required the use of at least ten stuntmen. Nothing I do requires even one. Also, Daley spoke a lot about eating red meat while smoking Lucky Strikes and did so never once using a noun.
Q: Do you have a lisp?
A: Many people ask that, but I have no problem with the sounds that give one a lisp. Nor do I bleed through the nose, as most of them tend to do.
Q: Ever since you started The Liquid Water Society [LWS] my wife has become distant to me. In a rare moment of confession, she said to me that unless I speak in a redundant manner, she cannot love me like she used to love me. My use of the English language is better, true, but my wife has lost her desire to be intimate with me, no less using a Joe Palooka punching bag to simulate a threesome. What would you do?
A: Sir, your wife is using LWS as an excuse, in my opinion, for a love that was lost long ago. In fact, I didn’t want to mention this, but every Tuesday afternoon I see her with a well-dressed man lunching in a café not far from your home. I can only assume she sees him privately and gets bopped without the stressful addition of the Palooka doll. You should keep speaking well, but not of her.
Q: What about copper dual-damascene devices?
A: Briefly, they are composed of six or more levels of interconnect wiring. A dielectric diffusion barrier is deposited atop copper lines to prevent diffusion between metal levels and to act as a etch stop during via formation. However, achieving a good copper/barrier bond has always been difficult. Implementing strict process control for the barrier’s thickness alone can improve yield but is one of science’s great metrology challenges.
Q: In the early shows you stood up and walked around more than you do now. Any reason for that?
A: It was my doctor’s orders back then. However, when I learned the orders had nothing to do with my health and all to do with his being an ex-Nazi, I stopped listening to anything he said.
Q: Why isn’t your Blog generally interesting, like J-Walk’s popular pages?
A: Good question. First, I have no interest in presenting my readers with information they might or might not like. Second, to compete with J-Walk is stupid because what he does best no one can do as well. Third, I hate to wear baseball caps. Fourth, I know nothing about Excel. Fifth, I run the risk of J-Walk learning that I purposely shoot rabbits just for the hell of it. Sixth, no man is an island. Seventh, the sins of the family fall on the daughter. And eighth, if not last on a list of eight, at least, not being like him allows me to mention him in my Blog and have him mention me because of that and I get more readers for a day or two. Incidentally, J-Walk's fascinating Blog can be reached on the internet at http://www.j-walkblog.com/blog/.
