Sunday, November 21, 2004


Gather ye thanks, one and all

Countdown to Thanksgiving …

A lot of you are saying, “Hey, countdowns to holidays are only good for Christmas.” Wrong. T-giving, as I call it to be hip and contemporary, is a more important holiday than Christmas, so let’s give it the respect it deserves. And let's let everyone participate in T-giving, not just Christians, who for the most part, own Christmas.

“What?” say some who feel I am being unfair to the so-called celebration of Jesus’ birth. Look, when we give thanks for all we have, even if it is only a one-bedroom apartment in the bad side of town where every neighbor is either a crackhead or a whore or a criminal or a prostitute and all we have to eat is turkey roll and cold spam with a Vienna sausage side, then we are truly seeing the brighter side of life and the fates. It’s ok if you want to celebrate the birth of Jesus, but let’s not get into the frills of Christmas, which have nothing to do with Jesus being born and all to do with the Mighty Dollar (like the caps there?).

I don’t want to get political here (we used to use the term religious, but these days with Christians trying to take over the U.S. government, it is appropriate to say political). Anyways, look, coming up in a few days is T-giving and we will be sensationalizing on the motives of the day with a special guest, The Monkess, from Daily Zen dot com – -- so let’s count down.

Let’s see, I am writing this on Sunday, so Sunday to Monday is one, Monday to Tuesday is two, Tuesday to Wednesday is three … all right then, four days until T-giving. So start lining up your blessings—or whatever you want to call them—and get ready to eat a lot, even if it has green edges on it, and be with us for The Monkess on Nov. 25.

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