Friday, March 31, 2006


Not a sound policy

As per the subject on the March 30 program, we do not support the policy of The Podcast Bunker, a web site that claims to be about "podcast quality, not quantity." However, its definition of "quality" appears to ignore content for the sake of technical prowess.

If you go to the "submit podcast" page, you will read this: "If you're a Podcaster feel free to let us know about your Podcast. We review each Podcast before it is listed. We have high standards for Podcast that are listed at the Podcast Bunker. Clean Audio is our first rule, if your Podcast has poor quality Audio, we most likely won't list it. If your content is interesting and your audio is high quality, sure we will add it and be more than glad to list your Podcast at The Podcast Bunker."

Aside from the poor writing in general, we cannot support a focus on technical quality over content. This policy is podcast snobbery, which does not serve the artistic community and ignores what could be terrific content for the sake of having to sound like a commercial vehicle. There are some great independent podcasts listed, but the fact that they are only able to share space on the web site due to "clean audio" is a dirty shame.

Internet broadcasting, which is akin to the rise of the podcast, must remain a stage open for anyone who is able to produce a product, no matter the quality. The Podcast Bunker has the right to restrict listings, of course, but should not be immune to the critics who understand alternative broadcasting is a theater more devoted to personal expression than the technical standards.

Thursday, March 30, 2006


They meet again

Curt Brandao and Frank Cotolo have been seen in public together many times, as witnessed from the picture on the right, when the two men testified against poor wages for soldiers fighting in the Spanish-American War. Meetings of the pair have always been controversial and on March 30, when they meet on Cotolo Chronicles, there is bound to be another ripple in the controversy stream from the clashing of two minds that one critic said, "have powder-keg opinions that blow up in people's faces and have been known to cause scars."

Certainly their wardrobe alone is enough to get people talking and it is highly possible, according to bookmakers in Nevada, that the two men will be wearing clothing from that wardrobe while on the air.

But, also, members, associates and authorities from the National Humor Institute (NHI) said recently that the NHI, often mistaken for the New Hampshire Institute of something, would transcribe the conversation and make it available to foreign governments for review, even without translating it.

So, don't miss this program, another landmark in alternative-broadcasting history and a good reason to begin a broad understanding of bandwidth.

It starts at 9 p.m. EST in the United States. You can tune in on my stream from Shoutcast -- and/or ...
Listen live, to, at:
Attitude Radio
Extreme Radio1077
Network Powerone
US RadioX
KPDC Radio
Mondays-Fridays, replays
True Talk Radio
Fridays, replay
Rant Radio
Saturdays, replay
Network Powerone
Flash Radio
Sundays, replay
Tyne FM
Network Powerone

Tuesday, March 28, 2006


All things must post

On this date a few decades ago, Beatles-member George Harrison wrote some thing. Not his famous original tune, Something, just some thing. We are sure of it. But mostly, the late, great musician's words about writing songs ring especially true today.

Thanks to my good friend Daniel, who provided the image above (photo by Daniel), we can once again read Mr. Harrison's words that, in essence, are far more important than his lyrics. In this case, however, his words are lyrical. They support the continuing journey down the Hallelujah Trail.

{The lake in the photo is the San Luis Reservoir, which is located near Monterey. It's a collection reservoir for water that is sent to southern California . In that journey the water is pumped over the mountains down by Bakersfield, recently in the news due to the death of hometown-hero Buck Owens}

Monday, March 27, 2006


Alvis has left the building

Alvis E. Owens, born on Aug. 12, 1929 in Sherman, Texas and known to the world as Buck, is dead. Long live Alvis.

Alvis and I had so much in common. His father was a sharecropper, just like mine, and Alvis spent his first years in deep poverty, just like me. His family headed toward California, like mine did, in the Dust Bowl migration in the late 1930s. But their their trailer broke down, just like ours did, and they settled in Arizona near Phoenix. My family bought another trailer and drove back to Brooklyn. Alvis worked in cotton and maize fields, like I did, and he dropped out of school around the ninth grade, like I should have.

Alvis took up the guitar, like I did, and eventually settled in Bakersfield, where I wanted to go, about 100 miles north of Los Angeles, where I went to live. Alvis broke into the local music scene as a member of a honky-tonk band called Bill Woods and the Orange Blossom Playboys, which was the name I gave my first group.

The rest for Alvis is history. Now, with Alvis dead, the world of music has passed the Buck.

Friday, March 24, 2006


Things couldn't be better if they were true

The numbers are up and we couldn't be more proud of their strength. These numbers are the result of the only calculating process in the world that could produce them. Can you handle the truth? Our program, which has a patented Italian design, incorporates a Japanese design and is said to be "like a spa for the soul." Imagine the possibilities now? With numbers like these, who needs an audience?

Thank you all for your unlimited support and to Dr. Xia Lei. These numbers would not have surfaced without 5,000 years of proven Chinese medicine, no less the use of a lab in Singapore. We are guaranteed that the numbers are accurate to within one second over one million years. Thank you, Dolce & Gabbana.

Thursday, March 23, 2006


Tall tales told as the truth

What is truth? Is it belief, all of which is unsupported by documentation? Is it a claim, accepted because a person autobiographs [sic] or is labeled an historian? Is truth nothing more than some thing disguised by style and what we all need to believe?

This is not so serious as you may now think. Come with us on a journey of style and truth, of fact and fiction, of human bondage, of mice and men, live on March 23. There will be gadgets, girls, glamour and, of course, Dolce and Gabbana.

It starts at 9 p.m. EST in the United States. You can tune in on my stream from Shoutcast -- and/or ...

Listen live, to, at:
Attitude Radio
Extreme Radio1077
Network Powerone
US Radio X
KJAG Radio
KPDC Radio
Mondays-Fridays, replays
True Talk Radio
Fridays, replay
Rant Radio
Saturdays, replay
Network Powerone
Flash Radio
Sundays, replay
Network Powerone

Wednesday, March 22, 2006


Everybody's talkin'

True Talk Radio (TTR) is running our program daily from its headquarters in the Great White North. Thanks to Howard Silbiger for his courageous decision.

Cotolo Chronicles airs Monday through Friday, from 1-3 p.m. Howard will offer "a bunch of old episodes and rotate them. When a new one comes out it will get priority, airing for at least three days in the week."

The station title is dead on. TTR is all-around talk and that is a brave format for an Internet station to have in this day and age. Howard has his own show on the station and there is a talented and varied cast of characters with programs that define the term "true talk."

Among the shows are Counterspin, which provides a critical examination of major news stories every week and exposes what the mainstream media might miss in their coverage. And there is another Frank talking on Frank Talks, an interview program featuring people of various and particular lifestyles.

For a complete schedule listing, click here.

Sunday, March 19, 2006


Chemical compulsion?

GRANTVILLE, Penn. -- There are reports that "medical researchers are investigating suspicions that drugs prescribed to treat Parkinson's disease could turn patients into compulsive gamblers."

Scientists are betting that there is a strong association between pathological gambling and the drug Dopamine. "It's 5-2 or better that this connection exists," said Prof. Rusty "Odds Line" Mendo.

Dopamine is a chemical produced by the human body that plays a major role in the way the brain controls the body's movements. A shortage can cause Parkinson's disease or periodic ballet movements (PBM). Dopamine is also associated with addictive behaviors such as drug use and pleasurable experiences such as sex and food.

"And," said Professor Iggy "The Book" Salzo, "this could mean the poysen [sic] would wanna do much stuff that is fun, which ain't so bad."

Right now, though (check for your local time), no definite links have been made between dopamine and compulsive gambling. Still, a few patients have filed lawsuits against drug manufacturers.

"I can't stop playin' poker," said a man who filed suit. "And then when I'm playing, I do pirouettes and blow the hand. I never did that before dopamine."

Pharmaceutical firms are considering warning labels such as: "This drug can cause undesired desires that are pleasurable but could affect the patients finances or cause a rash from sexual contact with vegetables."

"There is still no scientific consensus," said Lefty "Righty" Spandacino, a businessman in the parking lot of a Nevada casino, "and if it turns out to be true, you might find that Parkinson's patients turn out to be better at craps."

Friday, March 17, 2006


Beauty anaesthetizes

Thursday, March 16, 2006


Let's be Frank

Just why are we here? Specifically, just why do you exist? How can you find purpose in life? How can I find peace? How can I deal with past mistakes? How can I change?

Big questions for sure, but what we all really want to know is this: Just what does Frank Sinatra have to do with modern internet porn?

Well, that question has been avoided by every contemporary talk show. But, on the March 16 Cotolo Chronicles program, you will hearthe answer.

And that is just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. Join me on the Hallelujah Trail and together we will face the questions that no other media program directly addresses, no less with refreshments.

It starts at 9 p.m. EST in the United States, from the United States (and make no mistake about it, they are states). You can tune in on my stream from Shoutcast -- or ...

To listen live, you can also visit:
Attitude Radio
Extreme Radio1077
Network Powerone
US Radio X
KJAG Radio
KPDC Radio
Mondays-Fridays, replays
True Talk Radio
Fridays, replay
Rant Radio
Saturdays, replay
Network Powerone
Flash Radio
Sundays, replay
Network Powerone

Tuesday, March 14, 2006


Ram rolls into Grantville

GRANTVILLE, Pa. -- In a shocking development in the on-going Buddha Boy story, the alleged spiritual hero of Nepal, 15-year-old Ram Bahadur Banjan, showed up in the small town of Grantville, Pennsylvania looking for Frank Cotolo, local resident and the man whose name adorns the title of the program, Cotolo Chronicles.

Ram disappeared last week from a forest where he had meditated for 10 months, during which his associates said he consumed no food or water and where he became a worldwide news item, believed by many to be the living reincarnation of the lord Buddha. Cotolo Chronicles made Ram's story a feature last year, when it was only a local Nepal news item.

Nepal officials said police, followers and family members were looking for the boy in the jungles of Bara, about 100 miles south of the capital, Kathmandu. How he wound up at the broadcast home of the popular program is as much a mystery as anything involving the youngster.

"I offered him a spiced ham sandwitch," said Cotolo, "but he refused. Said he liked olive loaf, but hadn't had any in almost a year. So it seems he is sticking to his story."

Cotolo noted a local law when Nepal officials contacted him about Ram's arrival. "Grantville has a sanctuary clause for would-be spiritual figures," he said. "Any so-called savior, messiah or would-be buddha can stay within the borders of the township safely."

The Banjan family said they were relieved to know Ram was alive and well. Ram's followers in Nepal, meanwhile, went on a desperate hunt for maps of Pennsylvania.

Monday, March 13, 2006


More meds for you and me

The world of medicine has produced remarkable chemical acheivements that, as this sentence proves, allow us all to live with clarity and rid ouselves of anxiety and any number of maladies with the regular consumption of pills. So, being among the medicated, I want to share with you what new medications are being released soon, in case you are worried you have an illness that will eventually kill you. Here is the short list of new med names, their functions and possible side effects.

Zyclomar -- Chronic headaches can cause excessive shouting, especially when a member of Al Queda is present. With this new medicine, the normal stress headache is reduced to a slow and pleasant pounding that can also act as a metronome. Side effects include include runny nose, backaches, liver enlargement, pink eye, coughing and mild nausea that produces the desire to ride a unicycle.

Estacuraphane -- The throat can develop small modules often called Rubalonias. They are harmless except when singing in any other key but F. This medicine assures the modules will only grow in a harmless shape, not unlike that of the state of Utah, thus leaving ample space to swallow chunky food. Side effects include fever, nosebleeds, lack of hunger, lack of sex drive and the strength to move a wheelbarrow at 45 miles-per-hour.

Syntrax -- Heart disease has met its match with this medicine. Taken at the first sign of chest pain, this miracle medicine keeps the heart pumping regularly. It is so potent that if taken during an attack, the person would still be able to pole vault. Side effects include tunnel vision, bridge vision, elevator vision, a fear of women police, hair loss, toe loss, fingernail biting and the inability to enjoy a Charlton Heston movie.

Hastamine -- The thyroid gland has long been a mysterious acting part of the body. In fact, three cases reported in 1956 demonstrated that under certain conditions the thyroid gland developed its own will and walked out of the body, causing severe damage of the skin. When a thyroid becomes swollen a person can experience dire conditions, not unlike that of a cat with a tail trapped in the spokes of a bicycle. This medicine forces the thyroid to stay slim and functional, even inside the body of a trapeze artist. The medicine not only sooths the thyroid, it spells it differently. Under the medicine's control, the thyroid becomes the tyroyde and in some cases can keep the body alive as long as 56 hours after a heart has stopped beating. Side effects include indigestion, congestion, nausea at the drop of a hat, dizzy spells at the sound of a trumpet, excessive smoking, dry mouth, dry skin, dry eyes, growth of a moustache on odd parts of the body, unnecessary bank withdrawals and the belief that one can bend their legs in the opposite direction.

Sunday, March 12, 2006


Another sermon

Are we better off than before?

On Sundays I reflect. After all, the Lord rested on Sunday, wondering why it took three whole days to create a planet. Still, he liked what he had done and no one else in Heaven dared criticize it. So, on Sunday, I reflect.

Today I think about things we had, the way things were and how we have it now and the way things are. Now is a strange time in our lives, because we have things we never had before. Still, our fathers and grandfathers were saying that about things they had and never had before. And that claim can go back as far as prehistoric man, if you believe in that stuff. So every generation, it seems, can reflect on the question, "Are we better off than before?"

To judge "before" and "now" is to make them two different times in which we had and had not. But before was once now and now will become before and then what? Can now that becomes before be worse? Can before have been so bad that now, before it is before, be harmful? Maybe they are both impotent in their impact and we are no better off than before and no worse off than now.

Think of this: All you have just read is now before and what you are reading now is now. Are you better off than when you began to read this? Maybe you are not the one to judge. Maybe you should just shut up and stay out of trouble? And, if you want to be a good man, now is certainly the time for all good men to come to the aid of their party. But, would you have been better off if you came to the aid of that party before? What were you thinking by waiting so long? Did you think it would be better off to come now just because of an old saying?

Maybe it is time for you to reflect this Sunday since you have so many questions. I'm going hunting.

Friday, March 10, 2006


Tag, you're it!

And now, some backdraft information. It is recommended that you listen to the March 9 edition of Cotolo Chronicles before checking the links below.

The references made in any one program are munificent and many people have asked we annotate them. Time does not allow us to annotate them all but the innovative use of "tags" now gives us a quicker way to keep everyone in touch with the text of a talk-show content.

Consider a tag like a footnote in a book or a booknote on a foot. All you do is click on the linked words in the blog text and presto, you are sent to a page at Technorati where a list of texts and pictures relate to the word. Try it below. From now on, in cooperation with Technorati, our blog will link people, places and things in the text. The scope of our references, however, even boggle the servers of Technorati, so some links will go elsewhere. Still, for those caring to investigate the subjects, hit the link and you are taken to the large and bountiful Technorati library or the endless pit that is the Internet.

From the March 9 program (download on the left, RSS feed on the left, rebroadcast stations listed in yesterday's text), let's annotate.

Buddah Boy recently spontaneously combusted.
We endearingly call the Pope, who now has an iPod and loves it, "Eggs Benedict." Britain's High Court is buzzing with a case of copyright infringement, but Ian Fleming, who created James Bond, did not sue Donald Hamilton, who wrote 27 books featuring a character that stepped into the spy genre.
Hamilton's character is called Matt Helm. DreamWorks has optioned the Helm books for a movie. Two actors played Matt Helm in movies and on TV. Dean Martin and Tony Franciosa. Those two actors also played in a move together before they were involved in the Helm projects. That movie was called Career. Hamilton always wanted Richard Boone (pictured) to play Matt Helm. Boone starred in Have Gun Will Travel.
The scope of the internet and indie performers has expanded to video at YouTube.

Thursday, March 09, 2006


Buddha, Monkeys and Matt on tap

March 9, Y2K plus 6.

On the desk for Cotolo Chronicles are a number of topics that will no doubt lead to a number of topics. Among them are a follow-up to the Buddha Boy story this program broke some months back; tales of the Arctic Monkeys; the emergence of You Tube; and the possible re-emerging of Matt Helm (image pictured), the fictional spy forever in the shadow of James Bond.

Starts at 9 p.m. EST in the United States, from the United States (and make no mistake about it, they are united). You can tune in on my stream from Shoutcast -- or ...

To listen live, you can also visit
Attitude Radio
Network Powerone
US Radio X
KJAG Radio
KPDC Radio

Fridays, replay
Rant Radio

Saturdays, replay
Network Powerone
Flash Radio

Sundays, replay
Network Powerone

Wednesday, March 08, 2006


In the Nick of time

The Blogger office called me the other day. A top official said, "Your numbers are down."
"Yes, I know," I said. "We have had some sort of a dip."
"Yeah, the numbers were increasing, you know, getting larger? And then, they started to dip."
"They certainly are down," he said, sternly. "This puts you in danger of losing this page."
"What? How can that be? There are blogs no one reads. Have you notified them?"
"How can we? We don't read them."
"What do you suggest I do?"
"Get better numbers. Promote more. I see you have added Google ads. That's a positive sign."
"It's selling out is what it is," I said, with the voice sounding a bit like the late Nick Adams, but, of course, before he died.
"Didn't Nick Adams commit suicide?" asked the Blogger man.
"I believe so."

Then he hung up. I had no idea that keeping a page at Blogger would mean keeping large numbers of page views or visits. I still cannot tell the difference between a view and a visit. Life is growing more complicated at a time when I should be more concerned about a financial advisor. After all, I am from a generation so unique, that it needs a unique financial plan.

Still, I intend to present another edition of Cotolo Chronicles, the program/podcast, on March 9, seven days before the ides. And, of course, that is the name of my new book. Seven Days Before The Ides goes on sale next week. Come by your local Bookbusters store and greet me as I sign copies of that book and any other book you hand me.

Monday, March 06, 2006


Things we read today

Look at some of the things we found in a book, why don'tchya?

A "Blue Moon" is the second full moon in a calendar month (it is rarely blue, but can cause suffocation if administered improperly).

A bibliophile is a collector of rare books. A bibliopole is a seller of rare books. A bibliolobster is a sloppy seafood consumer.

A ghost writer pens an anonymous book. A dead writer tells no tales.

A magic potion or charm thought to arouse sexual love, especially toward a specific person, is known as a "philter." A store that sells philters is called a Philtermat.

A speleologist studies caves. A Spielbergogist studies Cate Capshaw.

"Aromatherapy" is a term to describe the practice of using essential oils taken from plants, flowers, roots, seeds, etc., in healing. "Aroomafortwo" is a secret meeting place in Italy for adulterers.

Ballistics is the science that deals with the motion of projectiles. Ballbusters is the science of breaking balls without using projectiles.

Friday, March 03, 2006


News from the Hallelujah Trail

Here are some links that lead to items that are all related to life on the Hallelujah Trail.

More on 'Converrrrrrgence'
You heard the term first on Cotolo Chronicles, now it gets major press.

An old favorite web site about the joy of surrender
Suports the old adage, 'When all else fails, so will you.'

Keep watching the skies!
As we presented on the March 2 program (feed and download to the left), UFOs are really getting to be a hot subject again.

Online music-pricing probe
What? Mp3 files overpriced? Downloading controversy?

Kiddie porn on iPod
It was only a matter of time for the iPerverts to surface.

I am the seal, not the walrus
Maybe I am not amazed.

Madonna awaits the Messiah and world's end
Everyone has to have a hobby.

(Pictured, ancient drawing of the Jewish Messiah sitting on a throne; author unknown)

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